Barney Isn’t as Pretty as that Tea Party Girl

By Stephen Guy Hardin

August 10, 2011

Republican Minnesota Congresswoman, Tea Party favorite and GOP primary candidate Michele Bachmann has proved once again how fair and objective the mainstream news media is as she becomes the latest liberal punching bag for what used to pass for journalism in this country. The current issue of that parrot cage liner…I mean news magazine, Newsweek, has Mrs. Bachmann as its cover story, whom they have labeled, "The Queen of Rage," accompanied by an unflattering photo of the Minnesota Republican.  Not since the campaign glory days of 2008 has the media descended upon a conservative Republican woman with such savagery and venom. 

From the sublimely ridiculous stories of migraines to trying to destroy her reputation as a foster parent the media has attacked Mrs. Bachmann as just a pretty face being manipulated by those brown shirted Tea Party fascists. The higher Mrs. Bachmann rises in the polls the meaner, nastier and more biased the liberal elitist media attacks become.

Ah, but never fear.  The cavalry is on the way.

Terry O'Neill, the president of the National Organization for Women (NOW) has come galloping to the defense of Mrs. Bachmann.

Yes, that’s right, NOW has come out swinging.

Ms. O’Neill dressed in her finest red flannel lumberjack shirt, ankle length denim skirt and comfortable Birkenstocks has jumped into the fray by denouncing Newsweek’s cover story as "sexist." Making a pointed reference to NOW’s founder and former Playboy bunny Gloria Steinem’s golden rule on determining sexism- would they do this to a man.

Man, indeed.

"Who has ever called a man 'The King of Rage?' Basically what Newsweek magazine -- and this is important, what Newsweek magazine, not a blog, Newsweek magazine -- what they are saying of a woman who is a serious contender for president of the United States of America…They are basically casting her as a nut job," O'Neill said to FoxNews.com on Tuesday. 

"The 'Queen of Rage' is something you apply to wrestlers or somebody who is crazy. They didn’t even do this to Howard Dean when he had his famous scream," she said. “Though Mr. Dean did scream like a girl.”

Newsweek and its editor Tina Brown have defended the cover photo, which is an extreme close-up of Mrs. Bachmann looking over the photographer’s point of view. The magazine also denied rumors that there is a holographic pair of devil horns coming out of Mrs. Bachmann’s head that can only be seen under a black light. A Newsweek spokesperson has denied any attempt to make Mrs. Bachmann appear Satanic claiming, “Since she is a member of the Tea Party everyone already knows she worships Satan.”

But I digress.

Ms. O'Neill went on to say that the main reason NOW, which is opposed to Mrs. Bachmann on every issue including the virtues of pageboy haircuts, the need to outlaw the manufacture and selling of girdles and why Mrs. Bachmann disempowered herself by taking the name of her male oppressor…I mean husband, is that the main reason NOW is standing up for Bachmann against these kind of misogynistic attacks is that their organization supports women running for elected office. Especially attractive women with piercing blue eyes who might let me take them out to Starbucks if I’m nice to them and publicly defend them.

"Of course my job is to defeat Michele Bachmann and I intend to do so. But good women will not run for office if Newsweek magazine can do this to such a prominent politician and get away with it," O'Neill said. “If someone as attractive as Representative Bachmann decides to leave public office we will be stuck with the likes of Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, Shelia Jackson Lee and Barney Frank.”

“Of course he looks nice in a dress and he wears make up well, but when you come right down to it Barney isn’t a pretty as that Tea Party girl.”

Or is it a Jon? 

By Stephen Guy Hardin

August 2, 2011

For the second time in several weeks Huntsman 2012 campaign materials have been sent out misspelling the candidate's first name. 

Instead of spelling the former Utah governors name as Jon Huntsman, it has issued campaign literature and press releases spelling his name John Huntsman. Oops.

Governor Huntsman is heading back to New Hampshire to try and right his slowly sinking campaign ship which has included his campaign manger being let go as well as a muddled message and a noticeable lack of traction in GOP voter polls.  In addition some of the released Huntsman 2012 campaign mailers mangled a story written about the candidate by the Wall Street Journal.

The mailer quotes the newspaper as calling Huntsman “The Conservative Problem Solver.” The Wall Street Journal piece actually quoted Huntsman himself: “When people look at what we’ve done,” he says, “they’re going to say, ‘He’s a conservative problem solver.’ I’m going to point people in the direction of what we’ve done as governor. I’m pro-life, strongly pro-Second Amendment. I think there are enough voters who will say, ‘I may not like everything, but there’s enough here to like.’”

"... but there's enough here to like."

Wow, there a sterling endorsement.  I can almost see the new campaign slogans for this fall.

“Vote for me because I’m okay.”

“I’m the man to fix this country’s problems even though I can’t get my campaign staff to spell my first name correctly.”

The Morphing of Mitt 

By Stephen Guy Hardin

May 13, 2011   

I like Mitt Romney.

Mitt seems like a very personable guy.

Honest. Reasonable. Reliable.

Good husband. Good father. Good friend.

He’s the neighbor you would ask to feed your dog and get your mail when you’re on vacation.

Mitt is the all American guy, who could be the male cheerleader in high school that was straight and still cool, even though he was a cheerleader and that was a still a little creepy.

But I digress.

I would love to just throw caution to the wind and jump on the Mitt in ’12 bandwagon and go after Obama and the Democrats full bore. 

I would like to, but I can’t, at least not yet.

Watching Mr. Romney in countless interviews defending the Obama-lite socialized medicine program he introduced into Massachusetts during his one term as governor is a little surreal and a whole lot of bad politics. 

As governor of Massachusetts Mr. Romney slapped together a health care system that could pass for the hillbilly cousin to Obamacare. Being true to his Mormon roots of compassion and caring, as well as following in the liberal Republican footsteps of his father, George Romney, Mitt tried to provide a safety net for the citizens of his adopted state.

It's a great idea on paper and on the campaign trail in Massachusetts, but reality is another thing.

Perhaps differing in their ultimate goals, the end result of Romney- care and the eventual result of Obama-care is the same. More government.

Obama and the Democrat Party have only one goal and that is the unregulated growth of the federal government and the eventual regulation of every breath and every step that the average American citizen takes. Whereas, Romney’s motives can be traced to his upbringing, religious beliefs and personal values, the reality of the inevitable failure of socialism has proven to be the great equalizer for Romney’s aspirations in Massachusetts and possibly even his ambitions in 2012. 

Mr. Romney’s compassion, integrity and ethics, while great to admire in a person and a president, is a distinct liability in the world of presidential primary politics. The single driving focus of any candidate for either of the two major political parties is to win primaries. As I often say, you can’t become president if you don’t get your party’s nomination. It may be a crummy way to pick a presidential candidate, but it’s the way things are.

In the face of withering attacks, from both right and left, on his attempt to create a state controlled medical monolith in Massachusetts, Romney has refused to abandon the principles he followed when he initiated the programs while governor. I respect his moral courage for not taking the obvious political path of saying he was wrong, but I also have to shake my head at the naiveté of a politician who should know better. 

Disavowing his failed attempt at socialized medicine is the obvious political stratagem, but to quote Mr. Romney, “it wouldn’t be honest.” He did what he “thought would be right for the people of my state.” A mandate to buy insurance, he said, provides the best alternative to prevent people from taking advantage of the state by getting emergency care at enormous cost to everyone else.

This defense of his program in Massachusetts, while still decrying the need to dismantle Obamacare for the nation, is where Mitt runs into the glass patio door.  There is no logic to supporting his programs in Massachusetts, while promising a swift demise to a national program that is identical in concept, philosophy and execution.

Come on Mitt, just say you were wrong, it’s not that hard, you’re married; you should be used to being wrong. I know I am.

Ah, perhaps that is what lies beneath. Is Mr. Romney, in his expensively packaged personal image and lacquered campaign package, unable to say, “I was wrong?”

Wrong, indeed.

The encapsulation of Mr. Romney’s political defense is best paraphrased as, Obama is wrong for doing what I did because Mr. Obama wants a “government takeover of health care,” while I just want to help people. My motives are pure and Obama aren’t, therefore I was right.

 That’s the kind of schizophrenic, twisted logic that keeps the nations divorce lawyers working overtime.

Following that path of Mitt’s tortured explanations to its dead end, what would stop President Romney from instituting his own agenda of overwhelming federal regulation and socialization, all in the name of helping people. Not much.

At least with Mr. Obama we know who we are dealing with. The singular problem with Mr. Romney and the other liberal Republicans out on the campaign trail is their soulless masquerading as conservatives. These closet Democrats only speechify about liberty, personal rights and excessive government during every national campaign cycle, but when they get into office they revert back to form. John McCain is a perfect example of this strategy and its ultimate failure.

When McCain performed his sudden change of heart and became a conservative, just in time for the 2008 GOP primary season, he didn’t fool anyone. McCain overplayed his hand and miscalculated his net gain when he plunked Sarah Palin out of the Alaskan wilds. The conservative passion of Palin only highlighted how liberal McCain really was and too many conservatives wished that their spots on the ticket were reversed.

Instead of being fooled by the arrogance of McCain the conservative base was enraged. This collective anger resulted in conservative voters staying home and sitting on their hands in silent (and not so silent) protest. We are now living with the results. Instead of a liberal McCain, we got a progressive Obama. The difference is only a mater of semantics, two tails on the same coin.

So, as the 2012 GOP primary season fast approaches we must remember how McCain morphed into a conservative after a long career as a liberal. We cannot allow ourselves to forget how the lack of a real conservative forced overwhelming numbers of Democrat and Republican conservatives to sit out the 2008 election.

We can only hope that as Iowa and New Hampshire approach, we do not see the morphing of Mitt.

Those Dark Continent Green Backs

By Stephen Guy Hardin

June 4, 2011

First Lady Michelle Obama announced Friday that she is heading to southern Africa on an official state visit at the end of June.

Mrs. Obama will stop in South Africa and Botswana to continue her work encouraging young people around the world to become active in undermining their countries and to join the International Obama Youth Corps.

The first lady’s campaign fundraising trip to Africa includes stops in Johannesburg and Cape Town in South Africa and Gaborone, Botswana and finally George Clooney’s Lake Como villa in Italy, but apparently President Barack Obama’s ancestral homeland of Kenya was inadvertedly left off the schedule.

Inadvertedly, indeed.

In addition to recruiting more mindless souls to her anti-American philosophy, Mrs. Obama will also focus on education, health and how to hide campaign contributions to Obama 2012 using fake IP addresses.

Media consultants working for the new George Soros political consulting entity, “Why Would I Lie?” Inc., who will be traveling with the first lady during her African adventure, stated that Mrs. Obama’s visit will highlight the importance the American left attaches to the millions of dollars in untraceable cash that is available from the legions of young, uneducated and uninformed Africans. The Soros spokespeople also emphasized the importance of African cash now that the Chinese no longer had any spare change to invest in Hope and Change.

But, I digress.

Though Mr. and Mrs. Obama traveled to Ghana together in 2009, this time the president is staying home to take a long anticipated vacation with Spike Lee,  Ludacris, Don Cheadle  and Marc Antony on a ‘Guys Only’ camping trip to the wilds of lower Manhattan.

This is the second trip this year in which the first lady will travel abroad without the president. Last year, Mrs. Obama visited Haiti after its devastating earthquake, then to Mexico for Cinco de Mayo and of course Venezuela, for the bar mitzvah of Hugo Chavez’s son, Izzie.

At the press conference announcing her travel plans, Mrs. Obama said that she was excited to visit Africa again, especially without her husband.

According to the first lady, Mr. Obama gnashes his teeth extensively whenever he travels within one thousand miles of Kenya.  Mrs. Obama further stated that without Barack in tow she didn’t have to worry about bumping into any of the presidents poor Kenyan relations.  Quote,” The only thing I need to worry about is how to sneak home those Dark Continent green backs.”

The Era of Cain

By Stephen Guy Hardin

June 5, 2011

One of my biggest reasons for supporting the long shot GOP nomination drive of Herman Cain is that it puts the Democrats on the race defensive, which is where they belong.  It is a well know and often stated fact within the conservative political community that the Democrat Party is the party of hate, racial division and racial prejudice.

It is the entrenched operational doctrine of the Democrat Party to label, separate and segregate Americans based solely upon their race, religion, and sexual orientation. The party of Jefferson Davis, Bull Connor, Robert Byrd, Lester Maddox, Albert Gore, Sr. and Al Sharpton, to name just a few, has streamlined the principle of divine and conquer into a monolith of racial oppression and political suppression. The more Democrats, with the gleefully willing help of the progressive national media, can create false coalitions of pseudo oppressed victims, the longer they can maintain their grip on the voting booth and their death grip on the American dream of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

The increasingly high profile of Mr. Cain, as well as the explosion of fellow Republican Allen West onto the national political scene, is proving that the real vision for the future of the American black community is being revealed on the right. The true voice of black political and economic empowerment is growing too strong to be ignored.  The only political party in the United States that offers the African-American culture any chance for survival is the party of Lincoln, the Republican Party.

A recent Gallup poll showed Cain with the highest voter intensity score of any Republican presidential contender.  Looking at the numbers, Cain is beating out the top tier of presumed GOP front runners from Palin to Romney. Cain’s name recognition has risen 16 points since March and with each passing day and each thundering sound bite the Cain star is on the ascendant.

After being declared the winner in the first GOP debate in South Carolina last month and then winning the straw polls at the Tea Party Patriots convention in February and the Conservative Values Conference in Iowa in March, a noticeable sea change of momentum has begun to shape the perception of the political novice from outside the D.C. establishment.

While many of the so-called professional political talking heads dismiss any real chance of Mr. Cain getting the GOP nomination he is pushing all the right buttons for an electorate that is weary of the barely concealed yellow, liberal streak that has permeated the Grand Old Party. The level of excitement for Herman Cain’s out spoken conservatism has highlighted what has been missing in the Republican Party since John McCain drove us off the cliff in 2008.

But I digress.

Herman Cain’s strong conservative stances has stood him well within the ranks of Tea Party activists nationwide, who have grown frustrated and angry at being labeled racists by a progressive national media dedicated  to reelecting Barack Obama.  The Tea Party, far from being the racist reactionaries that the east coast liberal media elites wish they were, recognize the promise and the real hope for an America based on values and individual liberty that a Cain presidency would represent.

“Tea party people love him,” said Jenny Beth Martin, the co-founder of Tea Party Patriots. “He’s not a senator or a governor. He’s just a mister.”

After witnessing the soul killing, cultural destruction sown upon countless generations of African-American families by a Democrat political agenda, whose sole purpose was the generational enslavement of a permanent voting bloc, a growing number of leaders within the black community are standing up, speaking out and fighting to take back the political future of their people.

In a history fraught with enslavement, persecution, prejudice and injustice, the hope for the future lies not with more entitlements and more false promises, but with the realization of true political freedom. The only path to true political freedom is through the removal of the yoke of political enslavement placed upon the black culture by the Democrat Party.

Political enslavement, indeed.

In the years to come people will look upon this time in our history, not as the age of Obama and the hypocrisy of his campaign promises, but the rising up of black conservatives, the rebirth of a proud people who have been oppressed by the party claiming to speak for them and the beginning of the era of Cain.

By Stephen Guy Hardin

Word has leaked from low level sources within the White House that President Obama sent a high level, covert apology team to the king of Saudi Arabia to ask permission to release thirty million barrels of American oil from the American Strategic Petroleum Reserve. A second, perhaps more important, aim of this political overture was to appease the Saudi king for any bruised feelings he may have suffered due to President Obama’s negligence in responding to King Abdullah’s, or Abbie to his male fiends, numerous phone calls, texts and Facebook messages.

Saudi Arabia and their OPEC minions have traditionally objected to efforts by the United States to achieve any type of oil independence, which includes efforts by the U.S. to manage its own strategic oil reserves without first obtaining Saudi approval. 

After eight years of hand holding and light petting from George W. Bush, the Saudi king has felt neglected from an Obama administration that has played hard to get to the point of being a tease.  After an initial period of courtship after President Obama was inaugurated there has been a noticeable alienation of affection from the White House.

In May of this year, in an effort to make up for any perceived feelings of rejection, the president sent a secret diplomatic envoy to King Abdullah, or Abbie to his close male friends, bearing a gift of the latest Tupac CD compilation for the kings listening and rapping pleasure. It was also reported that First Lady Michelle Obama included in this diplomatic package a framed 8 x 10 color glossy of Reverend Jeremiah Wright in a ‘fatherly’ embrace with a young Barack for the kings photo album of American presidents.

In an obvious yet subtle display of affection, King Abdullah, or Abbie to his close male friends, gave President Obama permission to release American domestic oil reserves just this one time.  But in a sternly worded note the king has expressed his disgruntlement at Barack’s personal aloofness and he fully expects some of that Bush loving that the Saudi’s have come to expect from American presidents.

Huntsman Fakes One for the Gipper

By Stephen Guy Hardin

June 22, 2011

President Obama’s former ambassador to China, Utah’s former Governor, Ralph Lauren’s former photo shoot double and the third most powerful Mormon in America, Jon Huntsman, has entered the fray for the 2012 GOP presidential nomination.

During his official campaign announcement the former governor pledged to make the “hard decisions” that are required to deal with America’s debt. Governor Huntsman also vowed to make every effort to appear to be a conservative until the day after he is elected president.

“I’m a candidate for the office of president of the United States of America,” Huntsman said, speaking before a surly crowd of reporters, photographers and media consultants with the Statue of Liberty used as a prominent stage prop.

In a less than subtle attempt to transpose the emotional presence of President Ronald Reagan onto his soon to be still born campaign, Governor Huntsman chose the exact location of President Reagan’s 1980 campaign announcement to stage his media event.  Though unlike President Reagan, Mr. Huntsman required the use of the Queens, Brooklyn and Manhattan Yellow Pages to ensure he could be seen over the top of the podium.

Yellow Pages, indeed.

Posing in front of his campaign banner, which at first glance was reminiscent of a Tommy Hilfiger label, Governor Huntsman twisted himself into a veritable pretzel in his efforts to channel the ghosts of great conservatives past. 

Quoting passages from Ronald Reagan speeches with the same level of sincerity that Barack Obama uses when he reads passages from The Constitution to one of Reverend Wrights Sunday School classes, the former governor and garage band aficionado tweaked the timber of his voice as he bemoaned the state of America under the administration of his friend and mentor, Barack Obama.

“For the first time in our history, we are passing down to the next generation a country that is less powerful, less compassionate, less competitive and less confident than the one we got,” Huntsman said. “This, ladies and gentlemen, is totally unacceptable and totally un-American.”

“We must make hard decisions that are necessary to avert disaster,” the former governor said, as he brushed back his gray locks and fixed the spellbound bevy of photographers with the infamous Huntsman stare that made him a household name in Utah.

But I digress.

Tough talk from a governor who, though popular in Utah, was known for his moderate policies and cool motocross costumes. Indeed, until recently, Obama’s man in China has been an outspoken admirer of the furthest left president since FDR and his potential Democrat opponent in 2012, at one point even complimenting the president,

“I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.”  Oops, that was Joe Biden’s quote about Obama. Well, Joe Biden or Jon Huntsman, same difference, eh?

Though, to be fair, every GOP candidate and candidate in waiting from Newt to Mitt to Michele to Sarah is attempting to channel the spirit of the greatness of Ronald Reagan.  Its politics as usual and just another day in the Republican Party primaries as Huntsman fakes one from the Gipper.

Michelle Needs Her Fat

By Stephen Guy Hardin

June 27, 2011

In her ongoing effort to reform the eating habits of fat, lazy Americans First Lady Michelle Obama queued up to the local Botswana Hard Fat Café to sample the local fare.  Mrs. Obama answered reporter’s questions concerning the need for global nutrition and dietary controls between mouthfuls of French fries and fat cakes.

Before leaving the eatery to begin the next leg of her culinary tour Mrs. Obama grabbed a large take out box of deep fried sausages and more fat cakes.

The locals welcomed the First Lady's visit at first but quickly became disgruntled when Mrs. Obama bought out two days of food and only left a ten percent tip.

Sizwe Moeketsi, one of the hungry villagers, said: “I am very proud of her visit, even for the restaurant as well, it will improve, it is a mileage as well because if they can use her trip very well, it can even upgrade their profile. But I am upset that she and her people ate all of our food.  Where will our children get their fat cakes and deep fried sausages now?”

This is not the first time Mrs. Obama has been criticized for eating out of both sides of her mouth.

Earlier this year Mrs. Obama was criticized for stuffing a staggering 2200 calorie meal into the mouths of state governors at a White House gala. When questioned about the dichotomy of her position Mrs. Obama replied, “Federal nutrition restrictions and government mandated eating habits are important to keep the masses under our dietary controls, but Michelle needs her fat.”

(John, Yoko and Dick Nixon's Just Like) Starting Over

By Stephen Guy Hardin · Thursday, June 30, 2011

Okay, just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water, John Lennon is labeled as a closet Republican and avid Reagan supporter.

What next?

The Monkees didn't write their own music? Jim Morrison was a member of The John Birch Society?

Jimi Hendrix worked the phones for Goldwater in '64? Malcolm X voted for Nixon in 1960?

Oswald was the lone gunman? Vince Foster really did commit suicide?

My head spins at the possibilities.

But, I digress.

Fred Seaman, who worked briefly as one Lennon's flunkies from 1979 until his murder in 1980 claims that Lennon "was a Ronald Reagan fan who enjoyed arguing with left-wing radicals who reminded him of his former self."

In a new documentary on the Beatles that Seaman is shopping around, he tells filmmaker Seth Swirsky that Lennon wasn't the peace-loving militant that he had cultivated as his popular image.

He says, "John, basically, made it very clear that if he were an American he would vote for Reagan because he was really sour on (Democrat) Jimmy Carter." Well, that's not exactly an indication that Lennon was a Republican. Hell, even Rosalyn Carter voted against Jimmy, but then again she really knew him.

Seaman goes on, "He'd met Reagan back, I think, in the 70s at some sporting event... Reagan was the guy who had ordered the National Guard, I believe, to go after the young (peace) demonstrators in Berkeley, so I think that John maybe forgot about that... He did express support for Reagan, which shocked me."

I'm not sure how shocking Lennon's so-called Reagan conversion should be considering who he was married to, being a closet Reagan supporter pales in comparison to a Beatle marrying someone who considered thrashing about onstage in a brown paper bag as art.

Brown paper bag, indeed.

"He was a very different person back in 1979 and 80 than he'd been when he wrote Imagine. By 1979 he looked back on that guy and was embarrassed by that guy's naiveté," Seaman said.

Yes, well, it's not hard to imagine Lennon being embarrassed by some of the asinine behavior he displayed during his sleep in for peace days, but being called out as a Reagan supporter over thirty years after his murder by a short term assistant with a shady past is a little much, even for me.

I'll believe Lennon was a Reagan supporter when Yoko petitions New York City to change the name of the Central Park area of Strawberry Fields to George W. Bush Gardens.

I'll go along with the idea that Lennon turned from the dark side and came over to the light when Paul McCartney publicly proclaims that every album he's done since Band on the Run has been total crap and he's only in it for the money.

I'll buy the idea that Lennon morphed from being a drug smoking, rich, spoiled anarchist to a conservative Republican when Yoko goes public with the inside scoop that John and Yoko's last album was dedicated to Richard Nixon's post Watergate image rehabilitation.

Yeah, well, none of that's going to happen but just imagine how tasty that album cover would be and of course there's the title, (John, Yoko and Dick Nixon's Just Like) Starting Over.

Gay Eye for the Teacher

By Stephen Guy Hardin

July 6, 2011

California lawmakers in the once great Bear Flag Republic have cut another notch in the bedpost of progressive political buggery.  As the National Educators Association crouch in the men’s rooms stalls of the capitol the state legislature passed a bill that would make California the first state in the U.S. to mandate teaching school children to celebrate the cultural richness and societal contributions of gay and lesbian history in public schools.

The bill, passed on a strict party-line vote, adds lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people as well as people with disabilities to the list of groups that schools must include in their lesson plans. It would also outlaw any material that portrays gays in a realistic… I mean negative light.

An amendment that did not make the final cut was a bill to educate school children on the evils of conservatism and how Ronald Reagan was a closet Nazi who made Nancy sing the Horst Wessel song when he was feeling blue.

Tom Ammiano, a Democrat assemblyman from San Francisco and part time Botox sales rep, said the SB48 bill was crucial because of the bullying targeted at gay students, as well as the need to educate future generations of males on the need to mix and match accessories properly. 

Speaker John Perez, the first openly gay speaker of the California Assembly and part time Jimmy Hoffa impersonator, said, “This bill will require California schools to present a more accurate and nuanced view of American history in our social science curriculum by recognizing the accomplishments of groups that are not often recognized. Unless you watch any network or cable television show or attend any Lady Gaga concert.”

Ah, yes, leave it to the Democrat Party to find another way to divide, separate and compartmentalize Americans.  Divide and conquer in the name of fairness, cultural diversity and social justice should be spray painted  on the  DNC platform right up there with underage abortion on demand, income redistribution, open borders and reeducation camps.

But, I digress.

In an effort to increase support for the bill Hollywood actor and purveyor of Russian prostitutes, Sean Penn, publicly endorsed the bill by invoking the name of murdered San Francisco politician and Hollywood gay icon, Harvey Milk,

” I think all California children should be forced to celebrate their own inherent gayness. In my next life I want to come back as Harvey Milk so I can embrace the gayness I missed out on because I was tragically born a heterosexual!”

When a member of the assembled media reminded Mr. Penn that Harvey Milk was dead and thus unable to allow Mr. Penn to reenter his body, the Hollywood bad boy suffered a minor emotional meltdown.  After flailing his arms about and screaming about Hugo Chavez’s rectal cancer and that Scarlett Johansson wouldn’t know a real man if she saw one Mr. Penn was led away from the microphones by his handlers into his waiting Hummer limousine.

Hummer, indeed.

The bill will now go to the desk of Governor Jerry Brown, a Democrat, who, while never having married, is well known for his love of cats and Goth vampire graphic novels. While the governor has not indicated whether he will sign the bill into law, his office issued a statement saying he will call a special hot tub meeting of his all male staff to brainstorm the issues over a nice merlot and a little brie. Former governor Arnold Schwarzenegger vetoed a similar bill in 2006 citing his strict Austrian upbringing, his long career pumping up with other men and his inability to say the word homosexual without spitting.

Republican assemblyman Tim Donnelly, who is known for his nervous eye twitching every time the word homosexual is spoken out loud, said he was offended as a Christian that the bill was being used to promote a 'homosexual agenda' in public schools.

“I think its one thing to say that we should be tolerant. It is something else altogether to say that my children are going to be taught that this lifestyle is good,” he said between twitches. “I think it is morally wrong to teach boys how to speak in a lisp and wear mascara!”

California law already requires schools to teach about women, African Americans, Satan worshipers, Mexican Americans, the joys of bestiality, Asian Americans, the evils of European Americans, American Indians, labor union thugs and the wonderment that is George Soros.

Over the years the California legislature has also enforced agenda driven lessons about the Irish potato famine, the Holocaust, the stealing of black music by whitey and the fascism of circumcision, just to name a few.

SB48 would require the California Board of Education and local school districts to adopt sexually graphic textbooks, upload gay and transgender porn and purchase various and sundry gay learning tools that will allow children to fully appreciate the fruits of gaydom. These materials would also include a vast array of dresses for boys from K through 5 to try on and wear during class as a means to reconnect with the warmth of their mother’s womb. Additional funding would also be made available for leather craft workshops for advanced students who show a special aptitude.

The bill's author, Senator Mark Leno, no relation to Jay, dismissed arguments that the bill promotes certain sexual behaviors and said it was important to put gay awareness where it belonged- in kindergarten. Senator Leno also implied that it was time that California school children followed the example of President Obama and accepted their inherent gayness even if they had to disguise it as metrosexuality.

“Bottom line, it's only beneficial to share with students the broad diversity of the human experience and that our democracy protects everyone,” he said. “Everyone except Republicans, conservatives, Christians, gun owners, and anyone who didn’t vote for Barack Obama.”

Church and conservative groups throughout the state have warned the bill will drive more parents to take their children out of public schools. Which considering the state of the government run school system in California would not be the worst thing for anyone’s children.  At least with your kids going to private schools you wouldn’t have to worry about your kids developing a gay eye for the teacher.

By Stephen Guy Hardin

July 22, 2011

While it’s good to be king, it’s better to be a progressive billionaire politician. Just ask New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, the thirteenth richest man in the United States.

Mayor Bloomberg is in the process of buying a $22.5million estate in the Hamptons from which to plan and plot his political future after he finally descends from his throne…I mean leaves office.

The 1910 Georgian mansion in Shinnecock Hills is an historic 22,000 square foot manor house which sits in 35 acres and overlooks the famed National Golf Links of America and Peconic Bay. It has black-and-white marble floors throughout, as well as 11 bedrooms and eight-and-a-half bathrooms. And of course we mustn’t forget the pool, tennis courts, servant’s quarters and horse stables as well as hundreds of acres of surrounding pastures, horse trails and woods.

The future Casa de Bloomberg is also rumored to have a secluded guest house just for the personal use of Alec Baldwin, the rumored successor to the Bloomberg Mayoral throne. As well as a buried, nuclear bomb proof communications center, 300 bottle wine cellar, 200 seat theatre and a vault for the mayors hidden gold reserves.

There are also reported plans to dredge up enough of the pastoral countryside to dock his 4oo foot yacht, the S.S. Mayor Michael Bloomberg, as well as laying out a paved landing strip for his private fleet of planes, nicknamed, “Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s Air Force.”

King…I mean Mayor Bloomberg will be able to enjoy the fruits of his evil capitalist ways in the palatial splendor a man of his means and tastes has come to expect. His latest acquisition adds to a growing real estate portfolio which includes a townhouse in the Upper East Side of New York, a mansion in Bermuda, a property in Vail and a time share in the Lincoln bedroom of the White House.

Much like his progressive brethren in hypocrisy such as John Kerry, George Soros, the Clintons, the Obama’s, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, etc, Bloomberg takes his elitist entitlement seriously.  But this is what we have come to expect from our liberal betters as they flaunt their wealth and privilege while lecturing the common folk on the evils of the system or as it is more commonly referred to as that Bloomberg style.

By Stephen Guy Hardin

July 27, 2011

Ah, that insidiously evil apple lobby is at again.

Just when you thought it was safe to eat out again there goes McDonalds’ caving into the pressures of corporate “Big Apple.” McDonald's restaurants have announced they will reduce the serving of French fries in Happy Meals to half of its current size. In its place children will be forced… I mean offered an order of apple slices or other bland, nutritional choices instead.

Ray Kroc must be turning over in his grave.

The change, to begin in early 2012, results in a 20 percent reduction in calories, fat and sodium in the Happy Meal and is being marketed as McDonalds working to curb the growing phenomena of fat American kids. The corporate shills at the golden arches claim they are responding to customer requests for healthier kid’s meals. Yet, while apples are currently available as choices for those who order Happy Meals, 89 percent of their customers don't choose the current option of apples over fries.

Apples over fries indeed.

What’s next?

Ronald McDonald is forced to put on a brown uniform and hold a copy of Mao’s Red Book?

Do they change the name of Happy Meals to Fair Nutritional Balance Meals?

Should we expect the golden arches to become the neutral, olive arches to promote a neutral economic image for the masses?

Are they going to put SEIU membership applications in the Happy Meals’?

Does the Big Mac get phased out because it has too large a carbon footprint?

Perhaps KFC will stop killing chickens and just serve tofu wings?

Does the image of Colonel Sanders get replaced by an image of a runaway slave?

Will Wendy’s market Wendy as a lesbian?

Or will Taco Bell do an image makeover and become La Raza Bell?

But I digress.

Instead of criticizing McDonalds for succumbing to the pressure of the progressive powers that be should we instead be thanking them?

How much easier will it be to be a parent as the federal government mandates the removal of one more odious parental responsibility?  Isn’t it easier to let McDonalds and the liberal lie machine decide how best to feed and care for our children. And when little Johnny or Susie or Paco cry for their saturated fat and high sodium comfort food we can just shrug our shoulders and point to the 8 x 10 color glossy of the president hanging above the McDonalds counter and say don’t blame me, blame Barack McDonald.

The Bloomberg Web

By Stephen Guy Hardin

November 19, 2010.

I know you didn't miss this one.  Especially considering it involves a Progressive billionaire who owns most of the city he rules. 

Michael Bloomberg, the self styled Emperor-Mayor of New York City, joined forces with Spiderman in an eight page, full color comic titled, " Spiderman, You're Hired!"

The comic follows the limp wristed, unemployed alter ego of Spiderman, Peter Parker, as he rides the subways of New York City looking for a job and a happy ending.  Parker happens upon Mayor Bloomberg, who is also riding the subways of New York City, coincidentally also looking for a good time and unemployed young men to help out financially. 

The comic was created after the Mayor's Office of Media and Entertainment made a call to Marvel Entertainment, which is owned by Walt Disney Company and so on and so on.  The New York Daily News ran the eight page spread and Apple is offering free downloads.  Ah, the joys of being a megalomaniacal Progressive billionaire politician, who has a quasi incestuous relationship with his fellow Liberal media ladies of the night.

I can only guess which superhero Mayor Bloomberg will date... I mean appear with next.

Will the Mayor appear in a commercial with Batman pushing the need for safe sex or will the Mayor co-host an appearance on SNL with Ryan Reynolds as the Green Lantern?

Perhaps Mayor Bloomberg will do a PSA with the Fantastic Four promoting the joys of alternative lifestyles or even stage a live media event in Times Square with Thor as the Mayor discusses the joys of same sex marriage?

'Minnie Mouse Wearing a Hijab'

By Stephen Guy Hardin

August 24, 2010.

Imane Boudlal, a newly hired restaurant hostess at Disneyland's Grand Californian Hotel, last week in a press conference accused Disney of religious discrimination for refusing to let her wear a hijab, a head scarf, in public view.

In one of several efforts to appease Ms. Boudlal, Disney has offered her a bonnet with a hat to wear at work in public.

Boudlal rejected the new head wear and went home for a seventh time, according to the hotel workers union, Unite Here Local 11. It's not surprising to find the hotel workers union, Unite Here, involved in this. Unite Here is a militant union that has strong ties with several gay rights activists groups and has even fought the infamous SEIU to a standstill. Any union that is willing to take on the SEIU in a turf battle is a union with an agenda to be feared.

"The hat makes a joke of me and my religion, and draws even more attention to me," Boudlal said in a prepared statement. "It's unacceptable."

Suzi Brown, a Disneyland Resort spokeswoman, said Disney managers are still trying to meet Boudlal's demands after providing options, including alternative costumes. The company also offered her four different jobs that would allow her to wear her own head scarf.

"We provided Ms. Boudlal with several options, including a modified costume that includes a blouse with a higher neckline and a newly designed head covering that meets our costuming guidelines and which we believe provides a reasonable accommodation of Ms. Boudlal's religious beliefs," Brown said in a prepared statement.

Ah, yes, the specter of corporate greed and lust for profit has reared it's ugly head.

Wait a minute...

Disney only offered her four different jobs and numerous costumes to resolve her religious conflict? Since I'm not a Muslim, obviously, I wonder how many different costumes and job assignments Disney would have offered me? That one of the problems with being a Christian, no radical Progressive unions to back us up.

The real agenda here is not Ms. Boudlal's right to wear her hijab to honor the oppressive religious culture of Islam. The real agenda here is Ms. Boudlal and her high profile attempt to cause disruption and intimation in the heart of one of the greatest global symbols of America, Disneyland. Ms. Boudlal and her radical Progressive masters knew very well the dress code policy of Disney and they were prepared in advance to create as much turmoil and dissension as possible, all in the sacred name of Islam.

Propaganda for the sake of propaganda is still propaganda.

This is not the first time Progressive-based unions have formed partnerships with the devil. The stated goal of the Progressive movement has always been the abandonment of The Constitution and the complete deconstruction of American society. As the old Arab saying goes, ' The enemy of my enemy is my friend.'

Strange friends, indeed.

When Ms. Boudlal first reported to work with a hijab last week, Disney assigned her to work in a back room so she could wear the head scarf while the company worked on an solution. Boudlal decided to go home instead without pay.

The most obvious question is that if Ms. Boudlal is so eager to go home without pay, seven times in all, then why did she apply for the job to begin with? It seems that the only job she wants at Disney is the one that will allow her to push her Islamic propaganda on numerous untold tourists and families at Disneyland.

Walt Disney must be turning over in his grave.

How different is this from the committed and determined efforts to build the Ground Zero mosque, even over the overwhelming moral objections of most Americans?

Radical Islamic propaganda is insidious in it's many well financed fronts.

So, naturally Ms. Boudlal has filed a complaint with the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Gee, wasn't that fast? And of course the Council of American Islamic Relations has joined hands with Ms. Boudlal's union to protect her rights to infiltrate... I mean work at Disneyland.

"They don't want me to look Muslim," Boudlal said in the prepared statement. "They just don't want the head covering to look like a hijab." Duh.

"Disney's treating the hijab as a mere piece of clothing that must be downplayed or hidden from guests view is unreasonable and discriminatory," said Affad Shaikh, the council's civil rights manager, in a prepared statement. "Disney should be able to accommodate Ms. Boudlal's request to wear a hijab (even if it's a substitute hijab that Disney insists she wear) in a manner that preserves her Muslim identity as well as her human dignity. The onus is on Disney to say that her wearing a scarf in her current position would be burdensome for them."

"Disney is an entertainment company," Brown said in a prepared statement. "Our theme parks and resorts are the stage and our costumed cast members (employees) are an important part of the show. When cast members are hired, regardless of their diverse beliefs, the expectation to comply with our appearance guidelines is made abundantly clear."

While Disney is known for its strict dress code, called the Disney Look, the corporation has made numerous accommodations over the years for religious customs and needs, such as longer skirt hems, skirts instead of pants, and hats as substitutes for religious head wear. In fact, in the case of Ms. Boudlal, Disney made numerous attempts to adjust her work attire to accommodate her special religious needs, but Ms. Boudlal would have none of that.

Apparently Ms. Boudlal and her union bosses will only be happy when children are lined up to have their photo taken with Minnie Mouse wearing ahijab.